Thanks for the Kick in the Ass

This indie author has lost some faith in the inherent good that she had always thought was inside all of us.  I try to see the good in people, I really do. And, I try to practice that in my own life.  If I see someone drop their billfold or leave part of their groceries sitting on the check out, I call out to them, and sometimes I will even chase them down. Kind of a karma thing, ya know?

Except, now I don't know.  Not any longer. Sometimes it just feels like no matter how you try to treat others, the same isn't granted to you.  Case in point: Saturday errands.  Dave and I had gone to Target and bought a bunch of stuff we needed.  Part of that included $37.00 in paper products.  Those paper towels and the toilet paper were too bulky to put in the cart, so we put them down below.

Yes, we remembered to pay for them.  As we were walking out, I also reminded Dave not to forget the paper products underneath the cart as he loaded the trunk.  I got in and Dave unloaded everything.  A sigh of relief.  One errand completed. We went on our merry way, getting meat, groceries, and some other products.

Finally it was time to go home.  A whole lot poorer, but glad to be restocked, we entered our garage.  Dave opened the trunk and I came around back.  Seeing the odd expression on his face, I knew. You guessed it.  He had not unloaded the paper products underneath the cart at Target.  We were both sick. What were the chances of someone turning in those products?

Getting back in the car, I immediately assured Dave that those products would be waiting for us.  People are good inside, I said. Those products were bought by us and were rightfully ours.  The world does not operate on negativity.   All is right with the world. We will find them waiting at customer service.

Except they weren't. When we asked, they called the security guard.  He said no one had turned them in and that once products go out the door they are not responsible for them.  No "do over" without cost.  We had to repurchase the items.  You may say it is not a big deal.  I agree that compared to, say, cancer or war, it isn't.  But we are struggling while I try to make it as writer.  Really struggling.  Like, first year of marriage struggling.  That $37.00 was a damn big deal.

We bought new paper products. I vented on Facebook, saying that from now on I would take anything I could and not worry about other people if they left things sitting, etc.  Not true.  Because, you see, even if some people are not inherently good, I am. I will continue to give a damn about doing the right thing.

My belief in humanity was damaged that day.  I look at strangers now and see them as a lot more selfish; a lot less caring. I try still try to do the right thing.  Each time I come to this planet I am supposed to progress.  Part of that progression is learning to treat others fairly. 

Still, you know what? I can't help but hope that whoever stole that toilet paper gets a UTI from it.  That is not serious, but can burn like hell. You might see that as petty. Right now I see it as treating others fairly.  Karma, you know.  Simply karma.