Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Jubilation! Cancer Free For Two Years

I began my journey as an indie writer a little over a year ago.  I had lost my job, but I also was recovering from cancer.  After the radiation I started writing The Gastien Series, only I didn't know it would become a five book series at that time. I had always wanted to write a novel and cancer taught me that if I wanted something I had better go for it because tomorrow is never guaranteed. I am now finalizing book three.
Today I got the results back from my mammogram.  I am still cancer free!  Two years have gone by so quickly that at times I still think it is time for me to jump in the car and go to radiation treatment. Then I remember, and thank God I don't have to.

I could blog for hours and not find the words to tell you how joyous I am that there is still no cancer.  Every year when it is time for my mammogram (it was more frequent than that up to this point) I become very stressed and scared.  I hope that fades over time.  And, when I am stressed, I EAT! I was doing quite well at not eating when I was full, but that went out the window a couple of weeks before my appointment again. 

Many things are still how I would not like them.  We are not financially strong. I am hoping to eventually make a living from my books and my art, but also know I may be going back to work for awhile.  We also doubt that retirement will ever happen.

I still hurt like hell in my muscles.  Separate issue from cancer. After years of that I doubt it will suddenly disappear. Looking for a job that fits my needs (note that I did not say wants) is difficult. I hurt. A lot. I also need time to write and paint.

I am still fat.  Until I hit my 40's I never thought I would be even a little overwieght.  Life is just full of surprises.
Our home needs a million updates to it and they will have to wait.  It is not in disrepair.  It is out of date.  Oh, well.  So am I.

I still feel confused when one book reviewer sympathizes with Gastien, saying he can't catch a break and another says there was no conflict in the book, that things were too easy for him. I have learned (almost) not to let it bother me, but it is still puzzling.  How do two people see things so differently?

I get frustrated with lack of time, lack of discipline, and lack of money.  But you know what?  None of it matters today, not even a little bit. Nope. I could care less.  Because, today, I found out that I am still cancer free.


  1. AWESOME!!!!!! Me Mom has been breast cancer free for over 20 years now. Fingers crossed. :-)

    The body, mind spirit connection is one hell of a power!

    I wish you continued health. And SISTA, don't you dare call yourself fat! Life is a series of changes and transitions. You have handled one of the most difficult ones like a champ. You're BE-U-TEE-FULL!!

  2. As are you, girlfriend. Please tell your mom I am cheering for her to stay cancer free.