Tuesday, April 10, 2012

What turns you on? (And this time, I mean sex)

As an indie author who writes dramatic stories about life and relationships, I many times need to write sex scenes. So, this "What turns you on" blog is about sex and romance.  You don't have to offer every intimate detail, but what turns you on?

I am curious.  Do most females really go for the syrupy romance?  I know I sure don't.  Yes, candlelight and roses are wonderful.  Kissing in a whirlpool in front of a fireplace is cozy.  Holding hands and watching ocean waves is delightful.  But none of that turns me on.

Don't get me wrong, it is not that I am not a romantic.  I just find romance not sexy. I love romance because it makes me feel appreciated and loved.  It is also an opportunity to show my husband how much he means to me in poetic ways.  It just won't get him a woman that is charged up for more heated things. Not one bit. Romance is romance.  And sex, glorious sex, is supposed to be sex.

Some friends of mine talk about certain famous guys and how they fantasize about laying on the sand at the beach, arms entwined and kissing.  Those visions are their ultimate turn-ons.  Not me.  If that is the best the man can do to show me how hot he is for me he will end up with me asleep and him alone with his hand.  Yawn.

I must have been a man during my last life.  Maybe most of them.  I don't look masculine.  I don't act manly.  But, damn. Cut the hearts and flowers and give me some raw sex! Talk dirty to me (not crude, show some intelligence and creativity.  Okay, sometimes crude is good, too), show me how out of control I make you, don't be afraid to go at it with gusto.  I am not a piece of crystal.  I am a woman and I want you to be a man. THAT will turn me on. Please note: I am NOT talking about taking a woman that does not want to be taken.  That is rape, and that is NOT a turn-on. 

Whenever I have daydreamed about a man, let me tell ya...we are NOT kissing.  We may be on the beach, but we are not sufficiently dressed.  There is a element of danger, of being caught.  We are dirty, we are needy and we could care less about being nice.  Or, we may be in a four poster bed with satin sheets, but it could just as easily be in the dressing room at Macy's or in the woods of a public park. The point is urgent need, not a movie scene for shrinking violets.

Forget "give me liberty or give me death".  Give me sex or give me a damn good reason why you feel like I have to be put on a pedestal in order to enjoy me.  And trust me, that reason won't turn me on. But if you ask me to pull off the freeway and ... Well, I promise you, that will.


  1. God I love you! I never know what to expect, but you always make me smile...

    Turn on? Raw passion..turning to him/her and seeing that look that says "I want to rip your clothes off, right here, right now"...

    1. Glad to hear it, dear, because you always make ME smile too! You are one in a million, girl.

    2. Smart men with great eyes! No kidding. I've had a crush on most of my male professors during my 100+ years of undergrad and grad school.

      When a guy can can reflect back to you what is beautiful and special about yourself, WOW! That is so sexy to me!

      XO :-)

    3. :) Very cool! Wow, though, 100 years of school? You have a lot of love for studying!